Throwback Time!

Honestly, depression has been making it really hard to do much of anything lately. That also includes doing my blog, so I’m going to do something a bit easier today. Let’s go back in time to the mid-2000s. Around this time I was 13-14 years old and starting to leave the realms of pop and discover the rock genre.

Oh, Hawthorne Heights. In my younger teens, during the farmhouse days, we had DirectTV. With the service came a channel called Fuse. They were like MTV but mostly geared toward rock, and they actually played music.

And I can’t make it on my own. (And I can’t make it on my own.)

Because my heart is in Ohio.

So cut my wrists and black my eyes. (Cut my wrists and black my eyes)

So I can fall asleep tonight, or die.

Heavy lyrics, no? But I identified with them and still do. Depression was already creeping in and at the time I was experiencing bouts of horrifying psychosis. I really didn’t feel like I could make it on my own and I felt helpless. My musical tastes have always reflected how I feel. The content on Fuse really intrigued me, so I began exploring more of the rock genre.

Scathing anthems and crushing ballads are a specialty of My Chemical Romance. I loved everything they created. The Ghost of You is one of my favorite songs of their discography. They expressed pain in a way that I was not quite capable of yet. If you want to know someone, pay attention to the music they listen to. Even if you don’t like the artists they do, pay attention to the lyrics. You’ll find the listener there.

One of my favorite bands from my middle school and early high school days was Panic! At the Disco. I love their name and I liked their emotional and carnivalesque style.


We are never sad, cause we are not allowed to be
Rain, rain, go away
Come again another day
All the world is waiting for the sun
Breaking Benjamin was and still very much is one of my favorite bands. There is just something about the band’s ability to go hard and angry, but then they also perform achingly beautiful ballads such as Rain. I used to sing this song in the living room when no one was home. Breaking Benjamin was one of the bands I consistently found comfort in.
Ok, there is going to be a part 2 of this at some point because WordPress is being a giant asshole to me, and I legit don’t have the patience for it right now.

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