Thumb Twiddling/Knee Bouncing

Well if you've looked at my Instagram feed recently, I have been cat sitting for my friends while they went for a short trip overseas. I've been staying with them for a while now. It has been pretty alright, but I think I am ready to fly out to Charles and fam. Only a little [...]


So, I know I've said this about my meds like a billion times before, but I think they are working. I hope they keep working. I know people with bipolar are more likely to go off their medications when they feel better, and that still blows my mind. It's been quite the three months for [...]

Throwback Time!

Honestly, depression has been making it really hard to do much of anything lately. That also includes doing my blog, so I'm going to do something a bit easier today. Let's go back in time to the mid-2000s. Around this time I was 13-14 years old and starting to leave the realms of pop and [...]

Have I H​it The Bottom Yet?

The answer is probably no, but one can hope. From January first until right this moment I have dealt with the aftermath of a thankfully not fatal car crash, went inpatient at a mental health hospital in response to a suicidal crisis, broke up with my boyfriend, moved out and began couch surfing, had an [...]

Grasping Smoke

So today I was late for my therapy appointment. So that was great. Then something to do with my transmission busted and fluid leaked all over the ground. Of course I didn't notice that until after my therapy appointment. So there I was thinking great, my stupid car is broken and so is my brain. [...]

So What Is Team Banana Phone?

Well, I've been making posts for a little while now, so I suppose I should explain how Team Banana Phone came to be. It's a pretty new thing actually. During my time inpatient, I met some pretty kickass and funny people. We had to pretty much come up with our own entertainment because we were [...]

Letters To Those I Love

I've got a lot of letters to write. One to Mom, Dad, my boss, and to Kenny. I want to tell them how I really feel and how they've affected me throughout my life. In the case of my boss, I want to say to her exactly what is wrong and why I have to [...]

Little Miss Sunshine (2006)

It's snowy and crappy outside (gotta love the midwest), so I decided that today I'm going to stay inside and watch movies. I just got done watching an endearing, funny, and of course melancholy little dramedy, Little Miss Sunshine. This sweet short film features an innocent and motivated little girl who just wants to be in [...]

Hypomania Vol. 1

Oh good old hypomania. Currently what I am experiencing today. Let's go over the symptoms, shall we? Inflated self-esteem or grandiosity: Anxiety is low, and I don't feel like I hate myself today. I feel like I can do anything, or a billion things today. Decreased need for sleep: I woke up at 4am and [...]

Movies and Medication

Yesterday I saw PitchPerfect3, today I saw I, Tonya. First one was straight up silly. Second one was ridiculous and melancholy. Tomorrow has to be straight up serious. I think I will choose Phantom Thread, from director Paul Thomas Anderson. I am in need of an artistic romantic drama. Tonight I do my first titrate [...]